Tom Tian
Articles illustrated by Tom Tian:
Modesty at her Vanity
in Issue 36 | Modesty (Jan 2014)I'm a hoarder of memories - the stuff in the closet - there are no mirrors - how much I enjoyed each kiss, how much shame I felt afterwards - being seen is like death - this is what I write in my journal, this is what I'm scared of - you're reading into it - you may have a pseudonym; your character may not be human - what I've authored disappears
If I Told You I Went to Church Because I Hated Capitalism, Would You Believe Me?
in Issue 18 | No Gods No Masters (Jul 2012)maybe you shouldn’t - I was lonesome - three moments - perception was individuated and unrepeatable - a falsely sanctified corner of the trash-factory that was the world - exquisite, squeamish horror - needlepoint plaques - we mourn because we have to forgive the dead
The Framework Game
in Issue 16 | Stupidity (May 2012)friend yelling at other friend - estimation (fast!) and experiment (slow!) - my arguments against « fast/slow-brain » were just « slow-brain arguments » - Everything Is A Remix - 99.9% of stuff is a remix - overcome her obsession about the « meaning of life » and « making a difference » - mean inaccessible hot girl
The Sabbath’s Recreation
in Issue 15 | The Elements (Apr 2012)rabbinic hermeneutics - the absolute perfection of the text - « He rested on the seventh day » - the erasure, rather than the solution - « like a man striking the hammer » - « Mortal man, who does not know his minutes » - the repetition of cessation - « a king who made a bridal chamber » - « If all the seas were of ink, and all ponds planted with reeds »
Making a Life or Making a Livelihood
in Issue 12 | Home and Pain (Jan 2012)our only small resource - the first beer, jam, and pickles we've ever made - necessary thrift, uncertainty, and improvisation - campsite as home base - the most gratifying forms of work - a market to fund backstories
Awk-upy: Left Love and Shame
in Issue 10 | Occupations (Nov 2011)a strange dance in DC - Žižek's word of caution - on the inside again - my suspicious involvement in the union - « I am guilty of resenting the masses » - lives on the left have felt misshapen and tenuous - resignation in the awkward
(Pere)(pere)(pere)stroika, or a Divorce Between the Signifier and the Signified
in Issue 9 | Reconstruction (Oct 2011)you’re not supposed to be there - « we didn't put them there, why should we take them down? » - the final phase of Soviet propaganda - two confident-looking farmers with impeccable posture painted in bold colors - we have been trained - a 200-ton statue of Karl Marx - proletarian revolution is the signified - history existed - overstimulation of political symbolism
In the Event of the Unexpected Onset of Retrograde Amnesia
in Issue 9 | Reconstruction (Oct 2011)a sense of my values - ever more secrets in all the wrong places - help getting home/warm/fed - don’t blame it on your amnesia - just with his emphases - his interest in this project of telling you things - soak each other up - a skeletal narrative of your past
Stay Hungry
in Issue 8 | Hunger (Sep 2011)interpersonal hunger strikes - the territorial integrity of Cornwall - a campaign to inspire awareness - a piece of chocolate calculatingly passed across the negotiation table - a forbidden phone call - an anteater rooting blindly through a pile of sand - emotional weight
Open Ends
in Issue 6 | Making an Exit (Jul 2011)the sign-character of waving - that exceptional recipient, puzzled or cautious, pointing to herself, mouthing, « Me? » - the famous cat who looked at the moon - another line in a thousand-page register - « And we will keep doing it. Back and forth. With the same poop. Forever. » - how can a thread of bubbles be cut? - vampire boyfriend watches like it’s porn
No Second Chance at a Last Impression
in Issue 6 | Making an Exit (Jul 2011)a morbid little man - the wittiest corpse within earshot - the prepubescent sons and daughters of Abraham would run screaming for cover - « I've had 18 straight whiskies… I think that's the record » - another hundred years to workshop my ultimate quip
Depressive Realism: An Interview with Lauren Berlant
in Issue 5 | Realism (Jun 2011)why do people stay attached to lives that don’t work - a realist account of fantasy - how people maintain their footing in worlds that are not there for them - the instabilities of sexual non-sovereignty - alternative institutions of intimacy - the reproduction of erotophobia - simultaneously material and fantasmatic - the first step to solidarity
Everyone Cheats
in Issue 4 | The Progress of Memory (May 2011)a caustically intoxicating Pisco Sour - a sober country would make a more responsible electoral decision - an untraceable gypsy cab racing breathlessly through Miraflores - Ollanta Humala - « Agua por Todos » - they cursed him between shots of grain whiskey - the spray-painted campaign promises of the losers - a choice between cancer and AIDS
At Covey’s Farm: History in the Mind’s Eye
in Issue 4 | The Progress of Memory (May 2011)a girl-spy in the Resistance - intricately plotted daydreams - a New England landscape without trees - historical memories that verged on delusions - the Lost Cause of the Confederacy - something more ephemeral, what it was like - the past is unrelentingly unfamiliar - « an apostrophe to the moving multitude of ships » - « O that I were free! » - I can almost imagine
Everyone Hates Vegetables
in Issue 3 | Nature and Its Enemies (Apr 2011)P.S. 98 in the Bronx - a brush with verdure - one-way power struggle - « poor Gladys » - Plant Based Food Day - « I’m not going to cut you, ‘cause I love you » - Juanita, the iron fist - watching televangelists late into the night - zesty meat - the necessary spunk to be accepted
Capture Yourself Alive
in Issue 3 | Nature and Its Enemies (Apr 2011)unreduced—an eyesore - full of details, often trapping details - beauty as consolation prize - an ordinary word like « talking » and invest it with a meaning that makes it hard - a desert - an erection - rumination vs. reflection - capture for the sake of capture
The Power to Punish: Conflicts of Authority in the Case of Jack Fiddler
in Issue 2 | Breaking the Law (Mar 2011)an evil and cannibalistic spirit - Porcupine Standing Sideways - « They are still living. No. I killed them. » - the Windigo phenomenon - blind use of Canadian law - authority to kill - the inevitable materialization of the laws of cause and effect - « The law does not permit me to exhibit any mercy » - committed suicide one afternoon
Micro-Politics: The Hidden Battle Against Internet Censorship
in Issue 2 | Breaking the Law (Mar 2011)as powerful as computer viruses - the Great Firewall - expunge dissident speech from their servers - the river crab, a symbol of censorship - a plush alpaca doll « harmonizing » his privates - from online avatar to real-world political banner - 目田 - decapitated freedom - the kind of instant poignancy that generates further memes